Challenges

I stumbled across this quote earlier in the week and it just seemed to ring true with where I am at the moment.

Confidence (or lack of it) is something I have been thinking about a lot lately, the sheer fragility of it.  It only takes the tiniest of occurrences to shatter it and yet can take an age to repair.  Why is it sometimes so hard to believe in ourselves?

This week has been challenging for me - I have had to push myself to do two separate things that were both, in different ways, terrifying.  Ok, so I am not talking jumping out of a plane or abseiling down a skyscraper but I am talking about things that to me, to the person I am today, seemed as difficult as climbing Mt. Everest.  Other people could probably have done them without so much as a second thought but for me it was far more difficult. I wasn't sure I would be strong enough, I was afraid of being judged, I worried that I wouldn't be as good as other people and I was frightened of what doing them might open up.

It would have been very easy to talk myself out of doing them, but I didn't.  I knew deep down that carrying through with them would be good for me.  I might not see that result straight away but somewhere down the line I will and in the meantime each little step I take towards my fears, the more I grow.

The more strength and courage and confidence I gain.  And it feels good.